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It's a cruel summer- You need some vitamin G.

Does your mind go down the rabbit hole when you don't have enough to do?

Song in my head:

“It’s a cruel, cruel summer,

Leaving me here on my own”


Living in the Pacific North West is a beautiful thing. You can’t get much greener then this, but there is a price to pay of course, lot’s and lot’s of rainy days.

Apparently, about 70 percent of Americans and up to one billion people worldwide have insufficient levels of vitamin D ( the happy vitamin), not to mention the many other benefits that come from sunlight. Like melatonin, which helps us sleep. Everyone I know has a hard time sleeping. Which leads to over loading of caffeine to get energy. And on and on we go. It’s cruel for sure.

I’m originally a California girl and the sun has been my best friend since birth. I lived in my bathing suit till about age 10. I think I was born with arm floaties on,cause we had a dough-boy pool, that was my other best friend.

The sun exposure set the stage of my upbeat attitude in life and my ability to laugh when it doesn’t make sense to. (And often when I shouldn’t).

This is why I know God has a bigger picture than we ever realize till we look back.

The way I grew up, from my parents and siblings and extended families personalities, to my school teachers, to the state I was living in was all part of the bigger picture on developing my soul to be who I was meant to be. To go through what I was going to go through.

The plan of our lives is so intricate! It blows my mind sometimes. The details that had to happen to make you, well YOU. It’s wild isn’t it?!

OK, coming back to my lack of vitamin D. The rainy days tend to isolate us, so you better like the people you live with or at least like being with yourself (and a kitty, in my case).

Now, I not only live in the North West, I live on the coast a couple hours away from my friends and family, so my husband and I and our kitties are a tight little private party in our cozy beach cottage. This time to be with myself has been so cleansing. I’m saying that in the nicest way. Cleansing in a way that I have not had enough distractions from my own bullshit.

What a gift, right?!

Sitting inside my little beach cottage on a rainy day. Doesn’t it sound cozy? Yes, it is right up until my brain wants to think about all the things that I don’t have and that I want to have and why I don’t have it.

Turns out everything is my husband's fault though, so that’s a relief. I can just be angry with him and analyze him and fix him. Yeah!

Well, that doesn’t really work out as well as I had hoped either, cause as it turns out, he doesn't want to be analyzed anymore or fixed by me. What’s up with that? He should feel so privileged to have someone like me right here to point out everything that is wrong with him!

So now what I am going to do with my rainy days?

How about I get over myself?

Turn within. See that yucky old past feeling that is trying to remind me that life is never good enough and that I will never be good enough or satisfied and just deal with it for a minute.

Look at my gatekeeper and say, “What’s up with you girl? Why are you tripping out? You're so used to being so busy in your mind and in your body and solving problems that you just can’t chill out, huh?”

And she says, “Yea, pretty much.”

Most of the things we are stressing out over are just habit. We forget that there are seasons for our lives, so when things or the pace change the subconscious mind is still running on the old program of self-defense and fixing mode.

How fast are we meant to go really? The computers can move and think and change in an instant, so now we think we are supposed to be the same way. We can move and change in an instant, but just like the computer, when we have too many windows open, to many programs running at once, the stream of power gets bogged down. The difference is the computer doesn’t have to go to therapy and get medication because it is thinking about to many things at once and has burnt out.

Not being able to go out and play for months at a time can lead to a lot of over thinking. I’m saying that in the nicest way. What I mean is, if we don't watch it, we will be going bat-shit crazy with worry and anger and blame and dissatisfaction about our lives if we are left to our own train of thoughts to long.

It’s almost June and it’s been the longest, wierdest winter in the NW ever. Several times I have written very long winded e-mails to people to “clear-up” something that were bothering me.

For God sakes woman! People getting them are like, “Where the heck did that come from?” So I apologize if you were one of the lucky winners that received one of those.

My only defense is Winter Madness.

Here’s my point. When you are going down the rabbit hole of rainy day-itis. Think about the things that were programmed into you at a young age to be the light hearted, funny, loving, positive thinking, making lemonade out of lemons, always there for your friends and family kind of person that you really are.

Remember wearing the floaties on your arm’s because at any moment you might have a chance to go jump in the pool. Remember falling asleep in front of the giant water cooler/ air conditioner that was as loud as a tractor. Remember the times when you spend hours just hanging out with the dog. Remember the times in life that you had nothing to do and you didn’t care.

Ok, I know those are my memories, but you get the point. God programmed you to be the person you are. To handle the things you handle. To have the perfect personality and spirit to enjoy the life that you co-created.

Reflect on those things and enjoy the time you have with yourself while you can. See God in all things and relax. There’s time for all of it.

Stay conscious,